When a layoff is the first day of the rest of your life

(It was for me.)

Jan 29, 2024

We’ve been talking here a lot about layoffs, and it’s a topic that hits home for me. Many of you know that my own 2019 layoff was deeply painful for me — but it also turned out to be a launch point for something so much better.

This isn’t a platitude or some type of magical thinking — it’s entirely true of my personal experience. And for that reason, I hope it can be some source of inspiration for anyone going through it right now. So I’d like to share my story here, as it originally ran in an essay for Northwell’s The Well publication in 2022:

Making Meaning From My Devastating Job Loss

I thought my job loss was the end of me—but it was actually the turning point I never knew I needed.

Although I’d worked in the notoriously frenetic and fickle media industry since my graduation from journalism school, I’d somehow managed to avoid getting laid off until 2019.

When it happened, I was 42 and feared I might never get another job in an ageist environment that was going through its own protracted identity crisis. It turns out, I was right.

It also turns out that it would be the best thing that ever happened to me professionally—but that was a lesson that would take time.

First, I was going to have to dig deep to find meaning in a soul-crushing job loss. And it was hard to imagine I’d ever get there as I sat in the cold office of some human resources person I’d never met, on an unfamiliar floor of that corporate office tower. Not to mention on that day, I was far more concerned with practical matters—like my family’s health insurance.

In the bigger picture, I felt washed up. I wondered what I’d done wrong to end up in a place so seemingly desolate 20 years into what should have been a soaring career. Had I stayed in an earlier job too long and stagnated? Had I gone into the wrong field entirely? Did I even know how to do anything marketable? (And if not, as it seemed was the case, how had I even been able to fool anyone into employing me this long?)

In the months to come, my insomnia raged. I’d arrive at hiking trails before the sun came up, and then cry over heartrending podcasts as I sought answers in human stories. By daylight, I worked on my resume and applied to jobs continuously. My schedule was untethered and so was my sense of identity.

During this time, I started freelancing as both a stopgap measure and a desperate grasp to hold on to some sense of relevancy as a professional. I channeled my nervous energy into the hustle. I did some interesting work amid some other stuff that I considered beneath my experience level.

Several months and no viable full-time job offers later, the pandemic hit. The world turned as crazy as the inside of my head had been since the day I got the ax. Everything was unknown now, and not just for me.

But to my own surprise, quarantined people’s clamor for digital content actually boosted my own writing business. My services were so in demand that I started shedding lower-paying, less-desirable work. I got choosy. I believed in my own growing prestige. And I really started enjoying what I was doing.

I made a logo and a website. I signed up for virtual continuing education and read industry books. I was learning so much every day and seeing through new eyes—for the first time in years. A slow realization dawned on me that I’d launched and built a booming business with my own name on the door.

And at some point, I realized I absolutely loved it and I shuddered at the idea of going back. To having a boss with unpredictable whims. To have a single employer, who could render me unemployed with the stroke of a pen. To working late hours for someone else’s bottom line. To abiding by a corporate rulebook. To commuting needlessly. To asking for time off and crossing my fingers. To the stress—so much stress. Nope, nope, and nope. I was done.

My burgeoning business was my anchor in the dark days of pandemic isolation.

Somewhere along the line I had become my own north star, my own creative outlet, and even my own daily joy. I turned down countless offers to discuss the type of full-time job I’d earlier been seeking.

These days I can honestly say I love my job, and that’s something I don’t know that I could have said before—at least not if I was being honest with myself. Instead, now I’ve learned to embrace the fact that the experience (ahem, age) I bring to this entrepreneurial role is not a liability but a boon that clients and colleagues seek out and respect.

So will I ever have a “real” job again? Never is a long time, and I’ve learned it’s folly to try to predict the future. But I do know that I love the professional life I’ve built for myself in the years since that day, as I watched a packet slide across an anonymous HR desk, fearing my career was over—and, perhaps worse, fearing my value had been terminated along with it.

Now I have to look no further than my own lived experience to know that the platitudes about opportunity after setback are quite real: The job loss that I worried would derail my happiness forever actually put me on track for an entirely new, and better, life. So to those dark days, I now send this love letter—with deep gratitude and pride.

What Is Even Happening With HARO?

Argh, what is even happening with this uber-confusing HARO changeover to Connectively? Seems like kind of a mess. Press Hook could be better. If you haven’t heard of it, it’s designed as a platform to connect journalists looking for story sources with brands who want to showcase their products and experts. It also offers a suite of helpful workflow tools. Journalists can search by product and category, and participating brands get exposure and affiliate opportunities — so it’s designed as a win-win for everyone (in the same vein as this Substack). Give it a try — right now there’s a 14-day free trial available — and let me know what you think.

Try PressHook

Tools of the Trade

Jennifer Goforth Gregory launched a course that I consider essential continuing ed right now: “Improve Your Productivity With AI Tools.” The course is geared toward not only understanding the fundamentals of AI for business writing but also knowing how to use it to actually make your job easier. You also get access to a live monthly Q&A so I consider this a great bargain at $125 (and it’s a write-off, to boot). I learned so much from it. It’s really not daunting — just a straightforward tool, broken up into easily digestible short sessions, with learnings you can implement right away. Sign up for the course here.
Freshbooks is the bookkeeping tool I use exclusively for my invoicing, expenses, and reporting. It’s the best, IMHO, so I evangelize. Get FreshBooks here.
Are you a publicist who needs help understanding the affiliate game? This course, Affiliate Marketing for Publicists, can help.
I’m obsessed with the game-changing platform Otter.ai. I use it to both record interviews and also to transcribe them in real time. You can also use it to record/transcribe any type of meeting — so anyone who missed it can easily access the Cliff’s Notes version. There’s a pro plan for agencies/companies with a ton of neat features. Check out Otter.ai here.

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Destination Cleveland is hiring a director of out-of-market media relations. “Must be a solutions-oriented, strategic and creative thinker with keen attention to detail and a strong sense of urgency. They will set strategies and work with team members, contractors and agency partners to garner media coverage of Cleveland as a place to visit and host a meeting in trade, drive-market, national and international media outlets. Additionally, they will work with the VP, PR & Communications to manage the strategic development and implementation of a media relations effort that positions Cleveland as a place to live and work in national and international media outlets. This individual is accountable for developing and executing a strategic plan, developing direct reports and meeting or exceeding metrics-based goals.” 12-15 years PR experience. Salary: $95,000. Apply here.

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